I’m riding the stationary bike, working off not only calories, but emotion too. I’m lost in thought, prayer and productive intentions. Thinking about how much my life has changed in the (almost) four years that my mother has been gone.  As sweat and tears drip from my body, I look down. I notice a big red button on the bike, a bike I’ve been riding…

One day in highschool, with a friend by my side and places to go, I got behind the wheel in a hurry. Such a desperate hurry I paid no attention to the proximity of the vehicles in the driveway. In full disclosure, I’m not even sure I noticed my father’s truck, which was parked directly next to my car. That is, until the moment I…

If they only knew grief can’t be healed or overcome, but rather learned to be carried lighter and with better handling. If they only knew how different things are now. How I’ve been completely transformed in both heartbreaking and purposeful ways.  If they only knew that she sometimes leaves my mind, but she never leaves my heart.  If they only knew that I need grace…

She said, “I’m not ready.” With a shattered heart I said, “Me either.” She said, “I love you, to the moon and back, forever.” With my whole heart, I said, “I love you more.” She said, “I’m scared.” With fear and anxiety I said, “I’m scared too.” She said, “I think it’s time.” Through tears I whispered, “I’ll go with you.” “You know you can’t…

Sometimes hurting hearts say: “Be grateful.” “It could have been worse.” “You had your mother longer than I had mine.” “You’re lucky to have had a mother like her.” Sometimes hurting hearts say things that sting. Sometimes they say things in judgement, jealousy, and heartbreak. While those are the words that slip from their mouth or are typed from their keyboard, they don’t reflect what…