Dancing in the Sky: Hopes & Wishes

Mom, I heard a song today. It delicately said “I hope you’re dancing in the sky.” I found myself daydreaming of you dancing on clouds and swaying with the gentle breeze of heaven. I found myself envisioning you bend and twirl and smile. You were beautiful. You always are.

I found myself smirking because I can’t remember a time I saw you dance. The only times that came to mind were when you were enamored in your baking. With one small taste the joy came seeping out in a graceful shimmy and shake. I envisioned you in your glory, moving through the kitchen baking things as sweet as the inside of your soul. With wet eyes, I paused as I remembered. 

Unlike the song, I don’t hope you’re dancing. I hope you’re baking, or reading, or doing any of the other things that made you smile from your soul. I have hopes for you up there in heaven, as you probably hold hopes for me down here too. Hope is such a funny thing, isn’t it mama? Invisible but mighty.

I hope you are free of pain and free of worry.

I hope you are free of disease and free of death.

I hope you are smiling.

I hope you are proud.

I hope you still love me with the same intensity you did on earth. 

I hope you are still you but with the body of an angel and the soul of a saint. 

I hope you feel the love because it didn’t leave with you. 

I hope so many things, just as I wish many things too. Wishes are funny things, aren’t they mama? Invisible but fierce. 

I wish you were here.

I wish you were here.

I wish you were here.

I wish for one more hug, kiss, and whisper of my name.

I wish time didn’t escape as quickly as it did.

I wish things were different. 

Hopes and wishes, mama. Delicate whispers of my heart. Silent to the world but so loud deep inside my soul. I wish you were here mom, but hope that no matter where you are you hold the beautiful greatness that you are. I can’t see you anymore but I can feel pieces of you so intensely it’s as if you never left. 

I wish you were here and I hope you know that. 

Hopes and wishes, mama. Hopes and wishes. 

xox, Chels