This weekend I overheard a respectful, but heated debate. Hearts and feelings exposed. The topic: comparing hard things. Hard things like divorce, parenting, marriage problems, and the level of “hard” each thing was.
I listened as each side made their case. Listened to the reasons “their hard was harder”. Listened to how “their hard was more complicated”. Listened intently to the comparisons of each person’s “hard things”.
You guys, hard is hard. Hard is not something with levels or something that should be compared. Your hard is hard. Their hard is hard.
Hard is hard.
It could be the passing of a parent, the divorce that shattered your soul, a miscarriage, a battle with cancer, the loss of a sibling…hard is hard. It’s not a competition. It’s not something to measure. Our hard doesn’t make theirs any less, and theirs doesn’t make ours any less.
Instead of comparing our hardships, we should be celebrating that we are here to help each other through them. We should be celebrating the strength in each other. We should be celebrating the grit and willpower to get through the turmoil and destruction that finds us.
Life is tough, and difficult, and messy. We all know it. We all experience it. But let’s not compare which hard deserves a medal and which hard deserves a high five.
Friends, let’s be there for one another, always. Let’s not compare circumstances or hardships. Instead, let’s be proud of the obstacles we’ve tackled and the heartbreak we’ve survived.
We continue to get through hard things simply because we have each other.
Yes so many tell me this since Dad died.