Marry the Person: Grief Edition

July 3, 2020

I’ve read countless “Marry the Person Who…” articles. All have held truth. All have held beauty. However, after enduring the loss of my mother, grief made my list much different than the ones I’ve read. 

Grief taught me important components of relationships and love. Grief revealed new aspects of my husband’s love and support that I never knew I needed, but became so grateful to possess. Items that I never had on any dating wishlist. Items that aren’t romantic or glamorous, but important and necessary. 

Grief taught me to…

Marry the person that becomes your lifeline when you’ve just lost yours.

Marry the person that doesn’t just take your breath away, but reminds you to breathe.

Marry the person that acknowledges your grief, your pain, and your sorrow, with grace and love and compassion.

Marry the person that picks you up off the floor, again and again, wiping your tears and working to erase your ache.

Marry the person that accepts your brokenness, your emptiness, and your journey to heal. 

Marry the person that understands the unpredictability of loss and the complicated mind of the grieving.

Marry the person that holds you up when you feel like failing, who carries you when you can no longer walk, and who encourages you to keep stepping.

Marry the person that can look at your parents on their deathbed and thank them for creating you, the love of their life.

Marry the person that can look at your parents on their deathbed and promise to protect you, keep you safe, and love you fiercely, all the days of their life.

Marry the person that acknowledges the important life lost, while also reminding you to keep living. 

Most of all, marry the person who will pick up your broken pieces and hold them carefully until the day you’re ready to take them back and build something beautiful from the heartbreak and brokenness. 

xox, Chels

Here is the love of my life. My rock. My lifeline. My person. Blessed to have his love, support and grace. xox

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4 comments so far.

4 responses to “Marry the Person: Grief Edition”

  1. Emily Long says:

    This post is just perfect. This is how I feel about my husband.

  2. Abby Nicol says:

    Yes! Yes! Yes! (I lost my mom suddenly this year after a fierce battle with stage 4 liver cancer 🙁 ) …. thank you for all you share! It helps many of us! Also love that you were married at Laurel Hall! My husband leads the organization that owns the building – so gorgeous and glad it was a perfect way to kick off your happy and loving marriage!

  3. Shenise K. says:

    Thank you for this…

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Chelsea Ohlemiller

Chelsea Ohlemiller

A wife, mother and educator who has Indiana roots and a passionate spirit. Chelsea is a sappy romantic, coffee junkie, book collector, and person who wears her heart on her sleeve. She’s sarcastic, full of jokes, full of tears, and enjoys writing most when life gets messy or complicated. In 2017, Chelsea's mother passed away. Through her grief journey, she decided to take her mother’s advice and share her writing with the world. One day she gained the courage to honor her mother's wishes and write. It turned out to be one of the best decisions she's ever made.

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