As I walk back into work, the first time since burying my mother, I feel different. In truth, I know it’s deeper and much more complex than that. I feel different because I am different. I hope everyone accepts this new version of me. I hope my pain doesn’t make them uncomfortable, though I’m quickly learning it usually does. My brokenness is noticeable. But they…
When my mother passed, my life paused and everything suddenly seemed much larger and intimidating than it had before. Overwhelmed with fresh grief, I let mundane household tasks become completely unattended to. I wasn’t trying to be lazy, I simply crumbled at the thought of anything that would leave me alone with my thoughts and my pain and my new reality. Laundry was one of…
She is broken. She is shattered. She is changed, forever. She is a woman with a mother in heaven. She is angry. She is confused. She is scared. She wants so desperately to hold hope and faith but somehow they have become unknown entities in this current state of life. She is suddenly surrounded by darkness while desperately searching for a speck of light. She…
I’m anxious and it’s apparent to everyone around me. My family is used to my anxiety. I’ve had it since I was a child. I should allow myself to be present in this moment instead of fearful for things that are days and weeks away. I should be enjoying this special family time. I know this but it doesn’t change my mood or my stress…