Sitting, waiting, wondering what your face will look like when I see you exit that building. This long line is full of eager parents. I can imagine we all feel the same anxiousness as we await to hear about your first day.
Not just any first day, but the first day back to school since the world became scary and pandemic-filled. This day had the same old first-day jitters, but also a dozen new ones too. We sent you off hoping and praying for your safety and the reignition of your love of learning.
So here I sit, anxiously waiting. With each moment that I drift closer to the school door my belly fills with butterflies, the anticipation of the stories and experiences you’ll share with me. You’ll never understand this unique feeling of unconditional love, bold fear and vibrant excitement until you are a parent yourself.
It’s a vibrant pursuit of roots and wings. A constant pursuit of growth and independence, while tightly holding on to the pieces of your childhood that remain. It’s the delicacy of parenthood. It’s the wonder of being your mom and your caretaker.
I can’t wait to see you. I envision your smile as you run to the car, trying to outrun the ones before you, simply to be the first to tell me about your day. While I’m confident there will be only smiles and joyous stories, I also pray for that reality too. Anything to make sure your school day is full of the greatness you deserve.
Getting closer now, the tears are flowing with the anticipation of seeing your sweet faces. I’ve missed you. Secretly, I hope you’ve missed me too.
And suddenly, there you are. Smiling and speeding to tell me about your day. I feel peace and joy and whole again, now that each piece of my heart is buckled in beside me.
The bittersweet beauty of the first day and all the days to come. The delicacies of parenthood and the wonder of being your mom.
I love you, my precious child. Now tell me about your day. I’ve been anxiously waiting.
