I show up for pilates after more than an entire year away. I’m weaker than I was and feeling vulnerable about my lost strength and my gained weight. I almost don’t make it into the building because of the way those realities make me feel– heavy and lacking confidence.
I walk in because I made a promise to keep going, to keep trying, to keep showing up for myself because during the last year I haven’t. Staying in shape, both physically and mentally, has always been a cycle of ups and downs.
Class starts and it feels good to be back in the action, back in the pursuit of physical strength and mental toughness. And just when I start to feel defeated, to feel the loss of ability that I once had, the instructor calls me out by name and says, “You’re doing a great job!”
She means it, I can tell by her voice. It’s authentic and pure. It almost makes me cry.
That simple compliment carried me through the entire 50-minute class. That two-second comment gave me exactly what I needed– support and encouragement.
It reminded me that it’s not about how many days and months I’ve went without being here. It’s the fact that I showed back up, that I made myself and my health a priority again. It’s about the heaviness that will be lifted, not in pounds, but in relief and healing. It’s about starting over, again and again, for as many times as it takes for me to stay here– in this space of health, fitness, and well-being. Not to improve the image in my mirror, but to improve the messiness of my mind and the way the world has taught me to care more about my image than my influence– both on my own life, and the lives of those that I’m near.
This instructors “You’re doing a great job!” was my saving grace today. It was my light and my hope. It was my reminder that we all need encouragement. We all need support and guidance. We all need inspiration– no matter how small, no matter how quick.
Friends, you’re doing a great job. You truly are.
You’re here. You’re breathing. You’re trying– however and whatever that looks like for you. You probably don’t feel like you are, but you are doing a great job.
You’re doing the best you can, and when you’re ready, you’ll push yourself to do even better. That might be today, that might be two years from now, but you will.
And you’ll realize that what you’re doing now is enough, and also what you’ll do in the future. They’re both great because you’re here, you’re trying, you’re healing. You refused to stay stagnant in this pain, this heartbreak, this life. And that’s powerful.
In case you need to hear it today– You’re doing a great job. You truly are. And I’m proud of you. I’m proud of both of us. We’re here and we’re trying– and that’s beautiful.
