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She Laid There Dying

Another Birthday Without Her: A Letter to my Mother on my Birthday

November 8, 2018

An Empty Seat at the Table

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💗 © Chelsea Ohlemiller: www.hopeandharshreali

💗

© Chelsea Ohlemiller: www.hopeandharshrealities.com (link in bio) Follow Happiness, Hope & Harsh Realities on FB for more content.
#grief #griefquotes #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefsupport #griefawareness #motherlessdaughter #motherlessdaughters #losingamother #loss

She keeps repeating “It’s time” as if a turk

She keeps repeating “It’s time” as if a turkey is ready to be taken out of the oven. As if this is an ordinary day or an ordinary occurrence. It’s not. My sister and I keep looking at each other, confused and heartbroken. The only words our mother has muttered in the last day seem to be these– variations of “I think it’s time”.

In a matter of days she’s gone from looking like herself to lying on her deathbed, aged and nearly unrecognizable. It hurts to think of how harsh the past 24 hours have been. Changes so sudden and catastrophic they are literally stealing our mother’s breath and heartbeat.

She is dying. Our mother is dying.

And even with her poignant calls that “It’s time”, it doesn’t feel like it is. Maybe because we desperately don’t want it to be. But she’s right, soon it will be time.

We’re avoiding the truths of our situation– that we will lose our mother, that these are our mother’s final living days. We’re a mixture of denial and hopeless faith in a miracle we know isn’t coming.

“It’s time.”--words that feel like goodbye. Words that signify an ending that we aren’t ready for. Words that we wonder if she understands the impact of, crushing our hearts into pieces.

Eventually she would no longer proclaim that it’s time. Eventually, she would be silent and breathless. Eventually, she would be right.

It was time.

To say goodbye. To mourn.
To be filled with anger of a life gone too soon.
To be filled with disbelief and the horror of those final minutes.
To be filled with the knowing of what death looks like.
To be filled with grief and a mother’s legacy.

We didn’t want to believe it. We didn’t want it to be true. But it was time. She was right.
Time for our final goodbye. Time for her transition to eternity.

Mom was right. She always was.
It was time…

xox, Chels

© Chelsea Ohlemiller: www.hopeandharshrealities.com (link in bio) Follow Happiness, Hope & Harsh Realities on FB for more content.
#grief #griefquotes #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefsupport #griefawareness #motherlessdaughter #motherlessdaughters #losingamother #loss

Today I’m sitting here thinking what my mom migh

Today I’m sitting here thinking what my mom might tell me. 💛If only we could get letters from heaven…

© Chelsea Ohlemiller: www.hopeandharshrealities.com (link in bio) Follow Happiness, Hope & Harsh Realities on FB for more content.
#grief #griefquotes #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefsupport #griefawareness #motherlessdaughter #motherlessdaughters #losingamother #loss

Today, honor the blessing that you’re a daughter

Today, honor the blessing that you’re a daughter too...even if your mother is in heaven. 💕
#nationaldaughterday

Truth. © Chelsea Ohlemiller: www.hopeandharshre

Truth.

© Chelsea Ohlemiller: www.hopeandharshrealities.com (link in bio) Follow Happiness, Hope & Harsh Realities on FB for more content.
#grief #griefquotes #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefsupport #griefawareness #motherlessdaughter #motherlessdaughters #losingamother #loss

A devastating reality—both everywhere and nowher

A devastating reality—both everywhere and nowhere, at the same time.

© Chelsea Ohlemiller: www.hopeandharshrealities.com (link in bio) Follow Happiness, Hope & Harsh Realities on FB for more content.
#grief #griefquotes #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefsupport #griefawareness #motherlessdaughter #motherlessdaughters #losingamother #loss

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