Making Memories Without You

July 28, 2019

You left this earth. We weren’t ready. Years later, I still get confused about how we live a life and reality without you. Years later, I’m confused how we are here, making memories without you.

I never thought you’d be missing all the fun, the laughs, the moments, the adventures, the trips…

But here we are, making memories without you.

I never thought you’d be missing the birth of your grandchild, the first steps, the first words, the moments where I need your parenting advice, the moments where I need you…

But here we are, making memories without you.

I never thought you’d be missing the first days of school, the grandparents days, the field trips, the special school moments that come each year…

But here we are, making memories without you. 

I never thought you’d miss the birthdays, the holidays, the cake making, cookie making, and all the endless baking that you so very much enjoyed…

But here we are, making memories without you. 

I never thought you’d miss the beach sunsets, the sandcastles, the sandy messes the kids are making, the endless trips to the hotel pool and the treats that help make any vacation so sweet…

But here we are, making memories without you. 

I never imagined a day where we’d be making memories without you. But here we are, doing it daily. 

Your absence stings. It feels surreal. It goes between waves of denial and waves of such a brutal reality that it knocks the wind out of me. 

Making memories without you is different. Life is different. Joy, love, and pain are different since losing you. Honestly, everything is. 

But we sit here, making memories without you…in hopes that you’re here, invisible to the human eye, but forever present in our hearts. Forever watching over all of these memories that for us, you’re missing from. 

The hope is that you’re not missing them at all…you just have a different view, and maybe your view is the best one of them all. 

xox, Chels

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4 comments so far.

4 responses to “Making Memories Without You”

  1. Teena says:

    Beautifully written … exactly how I feel about losing my beautiful mother too ❤️

  2. Liz says:

    This one.. I needed today. As my family has once again placed me in charge of looking at places for a family weeklong vacation without her.. my mom passed on Christmas Morning 2021. I want to make memories with my nieces and nephews that will make her happy along with my dad.. but it makes me so sad at the same time. I know one day. I’ll feel like me again. Right now.. I don’t. Right this second.. i do not and that’s ok too.

  3. Robin says:

    This is what our children and myself are struggling with when my husband and their father died. Making new memories without Mark is sad and devastating yet happy and joyful. It’s a complex feeling of some guilt mixed with feeling contentment. The last part of this composition is what resonates most with me. I feel that he is with us as he lives in our hearts and that he can experience these new memories with us, it’s just in a different way.

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Chelsea

Chelsea

A wife, mother and educator who has Indiana roots and a passionate spirit. Chelsea is a sappy romantic, coffee junkie, book collector, and person who wears her heart on her sleeve. She’s sarcastic, full of jokes, full of tears, and enjoys writing most when life gets messy or complicated. In 2017, Chelsea's mother passed away. Through her grief journey, she decided to take her mother’s advice and share her writing with the world. One day she gained the courage to honor her mother's wishes and write. It turned out to be one of the best decisions she's ever made.

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